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Syukron Jazzakumullah Khoiron Katsiro.
Ikhwan Sejati[ Tuesday, September 27, 2005 ]Seorang Ibu menjawab sebuah pertanyaan dari anak laki-lakinya dengan penuh senyuman tulusnya..: Nak..... Ikhwan sejati Bukanlah dilihat dari bahunya yang kekar, Tapi dari kasih sayangnya pada orang disekitarnya Bukanlah dilihat dari suaranya yang lantang Tapi dari kelembutan mengatakan kebenaran Bukanlah dilihat dari jumlah sahabat di sekitarnya Tapi dari sikap bersahabatnya pada generasi muda bangsa Bukanlah dilihat bagaimana dia dihormati ditempat kerjanya Tapi bagaimana dia dihormati di rumahnya Bukanlah dilihat dari kerasnya pukulan Tapi dari sikap bijaknya memahami persoalan Bukanlah dilihat dari dadanya yang bidang Tapi dari hati yang ada dibalik itu Bukanlah dilihat dari banyaknya akhwat yang memuja Tetapi dari komitmennya terhadap akhwat yang dicintai Bukanlah dilihat dari jumlah barbel yang dibebankan Tapi dari tabahnya dia menjalani liku-liku kehidupan Bukan dilihat dari kerasnya dia membaca Al-Qur'an Tapi konsistennya dia menjalankan apa yang ia baca Si anak bertanya kembali.. "Siapakah yang dapat memenuhi kriteria seperti itu,Ummi?" Si Ibu memberi sebuah buku dan berkata "Pelajari siapa yang ada di dalam buku ini!" Si anak menerima dan membaca judul buku itu sambil berkata "Oooo....Muhammad, semoga sholawat dan salam selalu tercurah atas dia wahai Robbanaa...
Ditulis [ akhtq ]
@ 11:58 PM
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High Quality Jomblo[]Semua itu mimpi o...o u o u o Hanyalah bualan o...o u o u o Semua itu bohong o...o u o u o Aku tetap saja o... tetap sendiri Kamu pasti udah hapal ama lirik lagu yang dilantunkan Armand Maulana sang vokalis GIGI di atas. Apalagi kalo ditanya judul lagunya? Hmm pasti deh pada ngacung. Tapi please, yang belon pake Rexona jangan ikutan ngacung ya (eh, ini iklan ya?). Bukan apa-apa. Takut disangka sumber polusi udara. Hehehe. keep smile ya. Selain easy listening , tuh lagu turut mempopulerkan istilah jomblo di kalangan anak muda. Liriknya seolah mengungkap kegelisahan hati seseorang yang belon punya gandengan. Soalnya, truk aja bisa punya gandengan masa' doi nggak. Betul? Betuul! Tapi ngomong-ngomong, jomblo itu apa sih? Ih tulalit deh! Gini, secara etimologi seperti tercantum dalam Kamus Besar Bahasa Indonesia , jomblo itu artinya perempuan tua yang nggak laku-laku alias perawan tua. Tapi seiring berjalannya waktu, terjadi perluasan makna pada kata jomblo. Kini, jomblo dimaknai sebagai julukan trendi' buat mereka (baik cowok maupun cewek) yang masih sendiri, belum punya pacar, dan belum punya gandengan (emangnya truk?). Pokoknya masih suka sendiri aja (atau memang belum ada yang ngajak barengan). Gitchu. Ehm, apakah kamu termasuk di dalamnya? Hehehe Pro-kontra seputar jomblo Dalam pergaulan remaja, perdebatan tentang status jomblo nggak kalah serunya dengan debat capres kemaren-kemaren. Banyak yang pro, tapi nggak sedikit juga yang kontra. Bagi yang pro, mereka enjoy bilang its oke to be jomblo . Predikat itu bukan masalah bagi mereka. Justru mereka menikmati hidup tanpa pasangan. Sebagai wujud rasa syukur mereka, ada di antaranya yang bikin perkumpulan dengan nama Jojoba alias Jomblo-jomblo Bahagia . Malah ada juga yang tergabung dalam komunitas Kelompok Jomblo Ceria yang disingkat Kejora. Ehm, Ijo Lumut ( Ikatan Jomblo Lucu dan Imut ) boleh juga tuh. Ada yang mau gabung? Pilih yang oke visi, misi, dan programnya (duileee). Wis, sundut terus! Mereka ngerasa keberadaan pasangan malah bikin ribet. Kayak memasung kebebasan bin kreativitasnya gitu lho. Deket dikit aja ama temen lawan jenis, dicemburuin. Nggak mau ngikutin kemauan yayang', dibilang nggak cinta. Nggak balas SMS atau missed call aja disangka selingkuh. Punya pendapat berbeda malah dicemberutin. Kalo udah gini, tentu being jomblo lebih asyik. Nggak terikat atau mengikat orang lain. Punya otoritas penuh nentuin langkah kakinya sendiri mau belok kiri, kanan, atau lurus tanpa intervensi dan pengawasan dari pihak lain. Mereka juga ngerasa nggak membebani orang lain untuk memenuhi keinginan-keinginannya. Nggak heran kalo para jomblo itu begitu bahagia dan ceria menikmati kesendiriannya. Huhuy! Sementara yang kontra, mereka juga punya alasan yang nggak kalah dahsyatnya. Bagi mereka, menyandang status jomblo seperti kutukan (wuiih syerem bener..). Soalnya hidup tanpa curahan kasih sayang dari lawan jenis ibarat sayur tanpa garam. Garing bin kering kerontang. Apalagi di kalangan remaja yang menobatkan pacaran sebagai simbol pergaulannya. Alamat bakal tersisih dari pergaulan dan memanen kata- kata sindiran yang pelan tapi dalem dan bikin kuping panas. Seperti yang dialami tiga cewek jomblo Gwen, Keke, dan Olin dalam film 30 Hari Mencari Cinta yang dituding lesbian cuma karena nggak punya gacoan. Gimana nggak gondok? Nggak ku..ku.. deh! Makanya bagi kaum antijomblo, nggak punya pasangan bisa bikin depresi. Gejala yang ringan sih mungkin cuma uring-uringan, mimik mupeng ngeliat temennya yang pacaran, atau krisis percaya diri karena tak kunjung laku (emangnya jualan?). Tapi bagi yang sudah akut, gejalanya bisa parah. Karena nggak kuat lagi menahan rasa malu, gunjingan atawa sindiran, orang bisa menarik diri dari pergaulan sosial atawa malah terdampar di Rumah Sakit Jiwa. Bukannya kita nakut-nakutin ya, cuma bikin kamu parno (paranoid) aja. Yee...sama aja atuh! Kaum yang kontra ini, ada yang sampe mendeklarasikan berdirinya PJI alias Partai Jomblo Indonesia. Mereka memperjuangkan persamaan hak dalam mendapatkan jodoh. Mengingat ada di antara mereka yang terkena dampak buruk dari rolek alias risiko orang jelek. Loyalitas mereka dalam perjuangannya terukir dalam semboyannya yang menggugah semangat. Jomblo itu pedih, Jendral...! Walah! Mending jomblo daripada maksiat Sobat muda muslim, kian hari opini media yang memojokkan para jomblo kian tak terkendali. Remaja makin diarahkan untuk berani mengekspresikan rasa suka kepada lawan jenis dengan berpacaran. Tayangan-tayangan ghibahtaintment yang berseliweran tiap hari di layar kaca, bikin permasalahan cinta menjadi masalah utama dalam hidup manusia. Kedekatan seorang selebritis dengan lawan jenis dikupas habis dengan bumbu sana-sini biar layak jual. Aksi penembakan yang dilakukan remaja diabadikan dalam Katakan Cinta. Perselingkuhan di antara mereka pun sampe melibatkan detektif H2C atau dengan pembuktian Playboy Kabel . Parahnya, remaja mengkonsumsi semua tayangan di atas setiap minggu. Cinta... cinta....dan cinta..... Tiada hari tanpa obrolan cinta. Otomatis secara psikologi ada beban tersendiri dalam perkembangan jiwa mereka. Malu bin nggak pede dalam kesendiriannya. Merasa terasingkan ketika kebanyakan temen-temennya udah punya gebetan meski usia baru belasan. Pengaruh media membuat murid-murid SMP pun udah Saatnya Mencari Pacar . Berabe euy! Maaf, bukannya kita mau melestarikan status jomblo. Bukannya mau ngelarang temen-temen jomblo untuk nyari pasangan. Bukan juga mengajak para jomblo untuk tabbatul (membujang). Tapi kalo upaya pelepasan predikat jomblo selalu berujung pada aktivitas pacaran, mendingan tetep istiqomah menyandang status jomblo. Seperti pepatah bilang, biar jomblo asal selamat dari aktivitas maksiat. Setuju? High Quality Jomblo= JI Sobat muda muslim, istiqomah dengan predikat jomblo bukanlah sebuah aib yang kudu disesali. Karena derajat manusia di hadapan Allah tidak dinilai berdasarkan predikat ini. Itu berarti kaum jomblo punya peluang yang sama besar dengan para alumninya yang udah merit untuk dapetin pahala Allah yang berlimpah. Jadilah High Quality Jomblo (HQJ) di hadapan Allah. Caranya? Pertama , HQJ nggak semata dinilai dari penampilan fisik seperti yang disyaratkan dalam Katakan Cinta. Tapi dinilai dari keterikatannya dengan aturan Allah. Ini berlaku untuk setiap perbuatan dia. Dari bangun tidur sampe tidur lagi. Sehingga melahirkan sikap akhlakul kariimah . Dengan tetangga sebelah rumah akur. Nggak sungkan ngasih pertolongan sesuai kemampuannya. Anti sikap individualis bin egois. Santun dalam bertutur kata dan menyampaikan pendapat. Bersikap tegas tanpa harus bertindak keras. Atau terbuka untuk menerima perbedaan pendapat. Kedua , seorang HQJ nggak dosa punya tampang menawan hati. Itu kan anugerah dari Allah, ya kudu disyukuri. Tapi bakal dosa kalo anugerah itu dipake tebar pesona sana-sini. Apalagi sampai diobral. Emangnya produk sisa ekspor? Nggak lha yauw! Ketiga , seorang HQJ juga pandai memanfaatkan masa kesendiriannya. Waktu, pikiran, tenaga, dan isi dompetnya nggak dihabisin buat ngurusin cinta yang nggak sehat. Tapi dioptimalisasi untuk mengekspresikan cinta kepada Allah dan RasulNya. Kegigihannya dalam menuntut ilmu semata-mata demi kemaslahatan umat. Ngasih porsi yang lebih besar dari waktu yang dimilikinya untuk terjun ke dunia dakwah. Itu sebabnya, doi aktif ngaji, getol dakwah, sopan, dan taat syariat. Malah ada juga lho di antara mereka yang prestasi akademisnya berbanding lurus dengan kecintaannya terhadap perjuangan menegakkan Islam. Karena doi yakin Allah akan memberikan yang terbaik untuknya (ajal. jodoh, rejeki, kebaikan dsb). Rasul saw. bersabda: Tidak layak seseorang, ketika menyaksikan suatu tempat di dalamnya ada kebenaran, kecuali dia akan mengatakannya. Sesungguhnya sekali-kali hal itu tidak akan pernah memajukan ajalnya dan tidak akan mencegah apa yang telah menjadi rezeki baginya ( HR al-Baihaqi ) Nah sobat, tiap orang pantas dan pasti menjadi HQJ seperti di atas (kecuali yang udah merit kali ya). Jangan minder meski tampang kita pas- pasan. Kuncinya cuma satu, ridho ngikutin aturan Allah yang original dalam keseharian kita. Bukan aturan bajakan yang doyan kompromi ama sekulerisme dan anak cucunya. Sebab cuma buat yang original Allah bakal ngasih garansi. Nggak cuma seumur hidup, tapi dunia akhirat. Di akhirat kita selamat, di dunia kita bisa jadi anggota JI. Hah?! JI?! Sstjangan bilang-bilang polisi ya. Entar didatengin pasukan antiteror 88 lagi. JI di sini artinya Jomblo Idaman yang bisa menjelma jadi CIA (Cowok Incaran Akhwat) atau FBI (Female Bidikan Ikhwan). Masa' nggak kepengen sih? Mengakhiri masa jomblo Sobat muda muslim, meski telah menjadi anggota JI, semoga kamu nggak puas dengan predikat itu. Apalagi sampe mengikrarkan diri untuk menjadi jomblo abadi binti sejati. Jangan deh. Gimanapun juga, Rasul mensunnahkan kita yang sudah mampu untuk mengakhiri masa jomblo. Dengan menikah, kita turut menambah barisan perjuangan Islam dan kaum Muslimin. Bagi ikhwan, jangan lewatkan peluang menjadi suami dan seorang ayah. Betapa nikmatnya memikul tanggung jawab. Terlahir suatu kekuatan yang mampu menggali potensi untuk menafkahi keluarga. Dan bagi akhwat, rasakan asyiknya menjadi seorang ibu dan pengatur rumah tangga, menjadi madrasah buat jundullah tercinta, atau mendampingi suami meraih ridho ilahi. Bener lho! Makanya kudu tetep semangat. Meski usia sudah masuk kepala tiga atau masih berstatus mahasiswa. Percaya deh, Allah pasti akan menunjukkan jalan bagi hambaNya yang hendak menikah demi menjaga kehormatannya. Kuncinya sabar dan tawakkal. Sabar tatkala kendala menghadang di tengah perjalanan kita. Misalnya calon mertua belon bisa menerima kita. Itu cuma butuh introspeksi dan usaha gigih untuk melumerkan diding esnya. Sama halnya dengan kesiapan materi yang selalu menjadi momok di kalangan ikhwan sebelum naik ke pelaminan. Yang perlu dilakukan hanya menentukan batas waktu yang jelas untuk memotivasi usaha persiapan materi. Bisa usia, tanggal, bulan, atau tahun. Jangan menggantungkan kesiapan diri kita pada materi. Karena materi nggak akan pernah membuat kita siap. Betul? Sobat muda muslim, perlu dicatet ya, kalo perlu pake stabilo merah menyala, kita di sini tidak bermaksud manas-manasin para jomblo untuk segera melepaskan statusnya. Kita cuma ngomporin doang kok. Hehehenggak ding, kita cuma mau ngasih informasi yang lengkap seputar pro kontra status jomblo dalam kacamata Islam. Ehm, moga paham. Kita udah cukup dewasa untuk menentukan pilihan. Kalo masih betah dengan status jomblo, jadilah High Quality Jomblo . Kalo nggak tahan ama sundutan untuk merit, ikhlaskan niat untuk meraih pernikahan berkah. Intinya, mari kita sama- sama berusaha agar keseharian kita tak lepas dari keterikatan dengan aturan Allah. Jomblo atau mantan jomblo, ya nggak masalah. Betul? Betuuuul!
Ditulis [ akhtq ]
@ 11:56 PM
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ANA UHIBBUKUM FILLAH[]DEMI MASA.... Demi masa... Sesungguhnya manusia itu benar2 dalam kerugian yang nyata Kecuali orang2 yg beriman dan mengerjakan amal sholeh dan saling nasehat-menasehati dalam kesabaran dan kebenaran ( Al ashr 1-3) Hari demi hari berganti tinggalkan berjuta makna hidup yang kelak kan diminta pertanggungjawabannya dan kita menitinya dengan asa merajut tali2 ukhuwah menapaki tahap2nya dgn sabar walau kadang hati bertanya ... sudah sampai dimanakah kita berada ditempat yg manakah kita berpijak shg terkadang sulit bagi kita untuk terbuka untuk berbagi satu sama lain... Ada yang ingin kukatakan padamu dari lubuk hati yg plg dalam dimana tersimpan cintaku padamu Sahabat... Maafkan aku... ketika sebentuk rasa ikhlas seperti luruh dihati karena kecewa yang melanda Maafkan aku ketika suatu waktu kita bertemu dan senyum tulusku menjadi harapmu tapi tak kau dapati saat itu Maafkan aku ketika kau membutuhkan kehadiranku maka yang kau dapati kata "TIDAK" karena kesibukan atau :) kekhilafanku Maafkan aku ketika kau butuh bantuanku aku tak dapat membantumu karena keterbatasanku sbgi manusia Maafkan aku ketika sapa hangatku tak lagi kau jumpa karena suasana hati yg belum terkendali ah.. teman.. aku memang belum dewasa Maafkan aku ketika sejumput perhatianmu terbiar walau hanya dengan mengucapkan jazakiLlah/ jazakaLlah Maafkan aku ketika cinta terpendam walau hanya sekedar kata sederhana ana uhibbukum fiLlah Maafkan aku ketika aku mengecewakanmu dan khilaf ntuk satu kata " AFWAN " Maafkan aku ketika waktuku kurasa terlalu singkat sehingga hampir tak ada waktu untukmu walau hanya sekedar berbagi walau hanya sekedar mendengar ceritamu walau hanya sekedar perhatian kecil Sahabat terlalu banyak kesalahanku yang mungkin tak sanggup kutuangkan... semua... ya... karena terlalu banyak... untuk sekedar dimaafkan... Tapi.. sahabatku apapun itu... aku ingin kau memaafkanku agar dihari pertanggungjawaban nanti kita tidak saling menuntut sehingga menambah beban dan dosa Sahabat mungkin tak cukup dengan kata maaf mungkin tak cukup dengan rangkaian kata-kata karena aku tak pandai merangkai kata... hanya kata2 sederhana saja Maafkan aku... Maafkan aku... Maafkan aku... Ana Uhibbukum fiLlah Wassalamualaikum warah matuLlahi wa barakatuh * Karena islam agama kasih sayang... Satukan manusia di dunia Islam agama kasih sayang Haramkan ummat berpecahan Dengannya manusia bersayangan Walau jaraknya berjauhan Dengannya manusia bertolongan Walau kulitnya berlainan
Ditulis [ akhtq ]
@ 11:54 PM
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Aku Rindu Zaman Itu...[]Aku Rindu Zaman Itu... Oleh: Nove pk sejahtera - JAKTIM - Aku rindu zaman ketika halaqoh adalah kebutuhan, bukan sekedar sambilan apalagi hiburan. Aku rindu zaman ketika membina adalah kewajiban, bukan pilihan apalagi beban dan paksaan. Aku rindu zaman ketika dauroh menjadi kebiasaan, bukan sekedar pelengkap pengisi program yang dipaksakan. Aku rindu zaman ketika tsiqoh menjadi kekuatan, bukan keraguan apalagi kecurigaan. Aku rindu zaman ketika tarbiyah adalah pengorbanan, bukan tuntutan dan hujatan. Aku rindu zaman ketika nasihat menjadi kesenangan bukan su' udzon atau menjatuhkan. Aku rindu zaman ketika kita semua memberikan segalanya untuk da' wah ini. Aku rindu zaman ketika nasyid ghuroba menjadi lagu kebangsaan. Aku rindu zaman ketika hadir di liqo adalah kerinduan, dan terlambat adalah kelalaian. Aku rindu zaman ketika malam gerimis pergi ke puncak mengisi dauroh dengan ongkos ngepas dan peta tak jelas. Aku rindu zaman ketika seorang ikhwah benar-benar jalan kaki 2 jam di malam buta sepulang tabligh dawah di desa sebelah. Aku rindu zaman ketika akan pergi liqo selalu membawa uang infak, alat tulis, buku catatan dan Qur'an terjemahan ditambah sedikit hafalan. Aku rindu zaman ketika seorang binaan menangis karena tak bisa hadir di liqo. Aku rindu zaman ketika tengah malam pintu depan diketok untuk mendapat berita kumpul subuh harinya. Aku rindu zaman ketika seorang ikhwah berangkat liqo dengan ongkos jatah belanja esok hari untuk keluarganya. Aku rindu zaman ketika seorang murobbi sakit dan harus dirawat, para binaan patungan mengumpulkan dana apa adanya. Aku rindu zaman itu, Aku rindu.... Ya Alloh, Jangan Kau buang kenikmatan berda' wah dari hati-hati kami Jangan Kau jadikan hidup ini hanya berjalan di tempat yang sama.
Ditulis [ akhtq ]
@ 11:50 PM
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Marhaban ya Ramadhan[ Monday, September 26, 2005 ]Tak terasa bulan penuh hikmah sudah dekat, dan akhirnya ane ingin mengucapkan marhaban ya ramadhan dan .... atas kesalahan dan kekhilafan ... ane mohon maaf yang sebesar2nya.. selamat berpuasa (insyaAllah) taqabalallahu minna wamminkum...
Alhamdulillah[ Sunday, September 25, 2005 ]Alhaamdulillah,, asiknya punya teman yang bisa ini itu, kalo mo apa-apa tinggal minta dan tinggal tunggu. Itulah asiknya punya temen di bidang TI, mo design tinggal bilang, mo hosting tinggal minta, mo domain tinggal ambil, kecuali kalo mo uang disuruh cari sendiri ^^; Btw sukron yach buat semua teman-teman yang selama ini sudah membantu ane ^_^;
::My Blog::[ Wednesday, December 08, 2004 ]Assalamualaikum!! Nama ana: Muchammad Taufiq TTL : 8 Desember 1985 Alamat: Jalan Kemandoran VII Rt. 006/03 No.4 Grogol-Utara Kegiatan: Sekolah SMKN 26 Pembangunan jakarta Kelas IV Rohis SMKN 26 Pembangunan Jakarta Wasilah(Wadah Silaturahim Alumni Rohis) SLTP 88 Magang@Compnet.co.id YahooID: izz_wasilah Hobby : Baca Buku, Denger Nasyid dll. 'Isy Kariiman Au Mut Syahidan "Ku Tahu Ajal Ku Sudah Di Tentukan Karenanya , Ku Persiapkan Diri Tuk Bertemu Rabb Ku"
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AWW.Subhanallah,akh..bagus banget isinya.Ana anak baru di SMKN 26 jurusan Tek.Komputer Jaringan/TKJ (dulu TIK).Akh,nt kls brp,atau udh lulus?Rohis juga ya?Kmrn ikut ke Cibubur?Btw,ana copy ya blognya..mo ana cantumkan di blog ana.Thankz.Jazakumullah.
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The man who follows the crowd will usually get no further than the crowd. The man who walks alone is likely to find himself in places no one has ever been.
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To live alone one must be a beast or a god, says Aristotle. Leaving out the third case: one must be both � a philosopher.
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Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
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The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the scythe.
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I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
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The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
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A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.
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Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
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Why is it that nobody understands me and everybody likes me?
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He loses his thanks who promises and delays.
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Twas a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.
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I use emotion for the many and reserve reason for the few.
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If it looks like shit, smells like shit, mail it to your enemy -- he'll know what to do with it.
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It was a Roman who said it was sweet to die for one's country. The Greeks never said it was sweet to die for anything. They had no vital lies.
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I don't know how to thank you.
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Thoughts are the gun, words are the bullets, deeds are the target, the bulls-eye is heaven.
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If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
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I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man's being unable to sit still in a room.
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Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
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When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better.
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I've never met a healthy person who worried much about his health or a good person who worried much about his soul.
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If you treat a person as he is, he will remain as he is. If you treat him for what he could be, he will become what he could be.
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The greatest reward for doing is the opportunity to do more.
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The man who follows the crowd will usually get no further than the crowd. The man who walks alone is likely to find himself in places no one has ever been.
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Genealogy is based on the obviously silly idea that there is no such thing as a bastard.
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My hands are free, but my mind hesitates.
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life? Well now, that's another story...
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It gets two thumbs up!
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If wishes were fishes we'd all be throwing nets. If wishes were horses we'd all ride.
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If wishes were fishes we'd all be throwing nets. If wishes were horses we'd all ride.
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I am very greatful to you!
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The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.
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When a female has tears in her eyes the one who cannot see is the male.
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In the end, everything is a gag.
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It gets two thumbs up!
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The church is near but the road is icy; the bar is far away but I'll walk carefully.
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Being kissed by a man who didn't wax his moustache was like eating an egg without salt.
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Ninety percent of everything is crap.
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If you wish to reach the highest, begin at the lowest.
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Too much credit is given to the end result. The true lesson is in the struggle that takes place between the dream and reality. That struggle is a thing called life!
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For those who fight for it, life has a flavor the sheltered will never know.
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Death is the final wake-up call.
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The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the scythe.
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Hypocrisy is the vaseline of social intercourse.
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Death and taxes may always be with us, but death at least doesn't get any worse.
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That's a hummer
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Most of the evils of life arise from man's being unable to sit still in a room.
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Never ask the barber if you need a haircut.
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What does an electric train toy and a woman's breasts have in common? Both were intended for children but no one can gets Dad's hands off either of them.
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Familiarity breeds contempt.
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"City morgue, you kill em, we chill em!" "City morgue, you stab em we slab em!"
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Don't tell any big lies today. Small ones can be just as effective.
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Absence extinguishes small passions and increases great ones, as the wind blows out a candle, and fans a bonfire.
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In our society, any man who doesn't cry at his mother's funeral is liable to be condemned to death.
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Growing old is not growing up.
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Decay is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence.
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How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these.
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Life being what it is, one dreams of revenge.
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We can do anything we want to if we stick to it long enough.
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It's not a question of happiness, it's a requirement. Consider the alternative.
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He loses his thanks who promises and delays.
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As the fly bangs against the window attempting freedom while the door stands open, so we bang against death ignoring heaven.
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A well adjusted person is one who makes the same mistake twice without getting nervous.
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Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you recognize a mistake when you make it again.
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You are not what you think you are, you are not what they think you are, but you could be what you think they think you are.
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Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out.
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I would sooner fail than not be among the greatest.
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How do you fix a woman's watch? You don't. There's a clock on the oven.
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I never think of the future -- it will come soon enough.
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My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
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If it looks like shit, smells like shit, mail it to your enemy -- he'll know what to do with it.
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There are no passengers on Spaceship Earth. Everybody's crew.
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Always expect the worst, and you will never be disappointed.
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Man is able to do what he is unable to imagine. His head trails a wake through the galaxy of the absurd.
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The chief cause of problems is solutions.
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If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies in yourself.
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Focus 90% of your time on solutions and only 10% of your time on problems.
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Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.
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Women make love for love, men make love for lust.
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Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
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When choosing between evils, I always like to take the one I've never tried before.
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I've been trying for some time to develop a life style that doesn't require my presence.
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Luck can't last a lifetime unless you die young.
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I've never met a healthy person who worried much about his health or a good person who worried much about his soul.
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It's like deja vu all over again.
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